Wednesday, November 10

Ok, taking a break from the novel to do a real post. I think.

A little depressed today: not sure if it's just backlash from the whole novel-writing thing (which I'm actually doing rather well on), or dread for the art classes I have today, or nervousness over the Plato Metathon this weekend. Everyone in that class intimidates me (except Katie Fisher, I think), and I feel really inadequate. But I've been mostly keeping up, until now. And I'm really REALLY scared that I'm going to say something this weekend, and everyone's going to suddenly realize that I'm not that smart, and is going to...I don't know. That's when I start to realize that this fear is unfounded, because even if that did happen, no-one would blink an eye, or even comment on it, really. It wouldn't change my standing with these people. Not most of them, anyway (the others I don't know well enough to say what they'd do).

So it's got to all be ok, but....Man, it's stressing. I wish some of my friends weren't so distant lately. It's not that they're not friendly, or anything, just...distant.

On the good news front, though, the novel is going well, and yes it has completely taken over my life. To the extent that I forgot to study for a test yesterday. (oddly enough, it was one of my better tests in that class.) Just so long as I don't forget to write the first draft of my paper, which is due next week! But the novel is going well. I'm not using up my plot too soon as I am prone to do, nor am I doing any unnecessary padding, I think. In fact, there are several places where I need to add a LOT of plot. And my writing group laughed a lot at a certain chapter that I liked, so that was good. (for those who are wondering, they loved the flashback in chapter 4, with the guy and his writing group. They loved that whole bit. Yay!)

I trust this book; the characters have started running ahead of me, showing me things about themselves that I had no idea were there. The whole thing with doing flashbacks and memories? Yeah, that was their idea, not mine. It's a good sign when characters start doing that, it means that they've taken on a life of their own. Huzzah!

This has been an incredibly helpful and productive project. This is more words than I've ever written at one time, and the most sustained story I've ever written. It's also very revealing, because I didn't think I could do it. I'm not sure I could without the challenge of doing 50,000 in a month. But I'm a very competitive person, and I refuse to be beaten by a mere deadline! Even if I did start 5 days late!


Linda said...

I really missed not having a new chapter to read this morning! I'm intrigued by the book---wondering why the first guy was there at all and what he was trying to do. It will be fun to see how it turns out.
Glad you got good reviews from your writing group--I know they are really helpful.
Hope your day goes well.
Love you, Mom

Linda said...

Posting as Linda, but really Linda's husband...
I'm glad to see that your characters are getting away from you. That never made sense to me when an author said that (YOU created them!) until a few years ago when I wrote a story about a Confederate soldier receiveing word that his family had been killed by Indians on the frontier. When I told--and tell--that story, I get choked up--every time! I knew then that my character had "gotten away from me"! Keep at it--you're doing great! --Joe

Marcy said...

Joi, I can relate to your fear of looking stupid! In my family, intelligence is very important and stupid comments could be heavily mocked. Normally it isn't a huge issue because normally I don't look stupid. But I realized after visiting Flinters that it can be an issue in certain situations -- like when I'm called upon to share my story's plot and I'm still uncertain it isn't trash. Now that I've realized I'm afraid I can bring that fear to God, work on it, and hopefully move on. They say bravery is doing what you need to despite your fear; may we both become brave souls.

Joi said...

Ok, to respond to all three. :)

Mom: glad you're enjoying it! I just found out a new reason for character being on the island! It's all tied in with this girl. This girl was not originally in the story; I had determined that though I was basing this off Dante, I was going to leave out this character, because I didn't think I'd do her right. But then yesterday, she shows up on her own, and forced her way into the story! And she had the arrogance to insist that I could not name her Beatrice (the analogous character in Dante), but that her name was Rachel. Gah! :) But she's a wonderful character.

Dad: Yeah, they do get away from you, it's weird! I mean, you could force them to do what you wanted, but then the story would be a little stiff and unnatural.

Marcy: Oh, don't worry about sounding stupid in Flinters. We all have at some point, and we all write junk, even Jim. It's a great way to learn to take critiques! :) Go Flinters!